In relationships, financial issues are often an invisible source of conflict, but their impact is very real. Many couples look harmonious on the outside, but are actually experiencing toxic financial friendship, a relationship condition that is not financially healthy. Although rarely realized, toxic financialship can damage trust, create dependency, and destroy individual financial stability.

Not only does it affect the wallet, toxic financialship can also affect mental and emotional health. You may feel anxious, helpless, or constantly blame yourself for failing to manage finances in the relationship. Let’s get to know more about what toxic financialship is and the characteristics that you should be aware of before it’s too late.

What is Toxic Financialship?

Simply put, toxic financialship is a subset of toxic relationships that focuses on the financial aspect. The term refers to a condition where one party constantly depends on the other person financially without any sense of responsibility or intention to be independent.

Interestingly, in toxic financialship, the relationship can appear normal. The abuser may not be rude, they may not be condescending, they may even appear caring. But underneath it all, they are just using their partner or friend as a “walking wallet”. The victim slowly feels mentally exhausted and financially drained.

Problems such as borrowing money without repaying, insisting on paying for all personal needs, and controlling through money are obvious forms of this unhealthy relationship.

Characteristics of Toxic Financialship

1. Unequal Contributions

The most striking feature of toxic financialship is the inequality in contributions. In a healthy relationship, both parties should contribute according to their abilities, whether it’s paying for a meal together, a movie, or just a small treat.

But in a toxic relationship, one party almost never spends money, even assuming it’s their partner’s responsibility. Eventually, it’s not about small expenses anymore, but about living expenses, installments, and even debt.

Worse still, the perpetrator often doesn’t feel guilty. They may say, “You’re the one with the extra salary,” or “If you love me, you’ll help me.” Manipulative sentences like these are an alarm that your relationship is on the path of toxic financialship.

2. Spouses Often Owe Without Good Intentions

Owing your spouse is not taboo – as long as there is communication and intention to pay. But in toxic financialship, debt becomes a tool of manipulation. The perpetrator takes on debt without any sense of responsibility, and often doesn’t even pay it back.

Moreover, they may also borrow money from other people, then involve their partner to help solve the problem. The victim ends up having to share the financial burden that is not their responsibility.

Usually, the perpetrators of toxic financialship also have a repetitive pattern: they always have a reason why they have to get into debt, and there is always a sad story that makes the victim feel guilty if they don’t help.

3. Manipulation Through Money

It turns out that toxic financialship does not only occur because one party lacks money. In fact, even those who have more financial power can become perpetrators. How do you do it? By using money as a means of control.

For example, the perpetrator threatens not to pay for education, living needs, or even traveling if the partner does not comply with his wishes. This is not a genuine favor, but a pressure-filled transaction.

Under these conditions, victims often feel they have no choice. In order to survive, they are willing to sacrifice personal decisions – careers, education, even dreams – because everything is controlled by their partner’s money.

If you feel trapped in toxic financial relationship, know that you are not alone. Many people experience it without realizing it because it is wrapped in the labels of love, care, or loyalty. But don’t let this unhealthy financial relationship keep you from the freedom and stability you deserve.

One of the best ways to get out of this kind of relationship is to build financial independence. Start with simple yet impactful steps like investing in digital gold at Treasury. With capital starting from Rp5,000, you can manage your own future without having to rely on anyone.

Remember, you have the right to have control over your own money. So, let’s break the cycle of toxic financial friendship and start growing financially with Treasury. When you can say “I can manage my own money,” that’s when real freedom begins.